Like I mentioned before with Dear JAG, this is NOT a cute way to announce that I’m pregnant. I just have some thoughts for my future daughter.
If the thought of your brother terrified and thrilled me, I have no idea how to explain how I feel when I think of you, my sweet one.
My heart trembles at the privilege of raising a little girl to become a woman after God’s own heart. How do I communicate what a precious jewel you are in God’s sight, as well as mine? How do I help you understand that you are loved, valued, and adored by an earthly family and a heavenly family? How will I ever let go when I want to hold you close forever?
I know the trials and turmoil that come with being a woman (in any season), trying to follow Christ. I know how difficult it is to ignore all the worldly voices and listen to God. I know how easy it is to place your value in corruptible things and how vastly empty and dangerous those things are to your spirit.
My heart aches for the first time you experience those hardships. Everything in me wants to take all of the hurt and pain and tough decisions away, to carry your burdens for you. But, pressing stronger than my urge to shelter you from suffering is my desire to see you take solace in our Savior.
Your Abba is the source of comfort, love, dignity, and strength. He, alone, gives you eternal value. I pray that His truth is imprinted on your heart, mind, and soul. I pray for peace to surround your heart, for gratitude to be ever on your lips, and for joy to spring up like a well inside your soul.
Your Grammy is a fantastic example of what a mom should be. She has pointed me to Christ in all manner of circumstances. She models a heart that yearns to know God more intimately. I can’t wait to share my mom with you!
I can only hope that God will reveal Himself in my imperfect, broken, fumbling attempts at motherhood. I hope that you see God’s redemptive power in my life, a life with which you are so intimately intertwined.
And what I really want you to know – like deep down in your soul, at the core of your being – is that you are a beautiful creation, an exquisite masterpiece, loved imperfectly by me and loved perfectly by an adoring Father.
With love to my beautiful girl,
You can find all my letters here.
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