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The Art of BEING

~ Emily ~ 3 Comments

Some women embrace motherhood. Others are embraced by motherhood. But either way, it changes all of us in ways we never expected.

Kristen Welch in Rhinestone Jesus

The art of being

When Your Internal Processor is Sleep Deprived

One very difficult aspect of life with a baby is not operating on full cylinders. Sleep is in short supply, making your body tired and your mind weary. I could deal with the physical ramifications alright if only my brain would function properly. For an internal processor, lack of sleep means less energy to, you guessed it, process!

When my processing is truncated, my hormonally driven mood swings are magnified in an unflattering manner. If something tousles with my routine or my ability to care for James, I can’t properly think things through. I don’t have time to journal about it (because, really, my extra time should be spent sleeping), and I don’t have the mental wherewithal to sort it out while I’m on the go before it effects my relationships and attitude. If I choose to think or journal instead of sleep, my family suffers at the hand of a mom short on patience and a wife short on warmth and grace.

Being Over Doing

Part of the problem is my inability, or unwillingness, to just BE in this season. And not be something I’ve concocted out of unrealistic expectations. I haven’t been allowing myself to just be, for better or worse, in the imperfections of this stage of my life.

I’ve expected myself to be a well rested, well processed person again and I’m finding that close to impossible. Maybe if I weren’t also expecting myself to remain well read, well nourished, and well exercised (for the sake of parallelism, we’re going to let that one slide…). Those things take a kind of effort that I am short on right now. I am constantly striving, stretching, and pushing to meet those expectations that I’ve missed the sitting with this season – the being.

Why struggle when I could just BE – be a mom who lets go of guilt and unreasonable expectations. Who is reconciled to having an unmade bed. Who goes for a 15 minute walk around the block instead of getting to the gym every day. Who is okay with being 10 pounds heavier than she would like instead of constantly hungry and sore. Who is fine with being a consumer of blogs instead of a producer. Who is okay with being behind on her reading list because she read five board books in a row. Who is okay with being unshowered and sloppy in order to catch a few winkies with the baby. Who is okay with being attentive to God’s presence in the everyday instead of forcing a traditional quiet time. Who is okay with being in-process instead of processed.

I want to be a mom who is finding joy in just BEING a mom.

 

Twitterature – March 2014

~ Emily ~ 5 Comments

twitterature

My reading habits have certainly changed since James arrived. At first, reading was out of the question – why would I read when I could sleep? – and then it was just difficult – how do I flip the page with one hand? Now, I have somewhat mastered the art of reading while nursing and though I am not reading as voraciously as life B.J. (Before James), my life isn’t devoid of books.

This month I’m including a couple cookbooks I’ve been enjoying and some board books James and I loved. Plus, I did something I rarely do… I abandoned a book! I started and stopped You Lost Me: Why Young Christians are Leaving Church…and Rethinking Faith by David Kinnaman last week, not because it wasn’t good, but because my sleep deprived brain wasn’t able to do the content justice. I look forward to picking it up again in a few months.

Linking up with Anne!

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Books

Wonderland Creek by Lynn Austin

A departure from the Austin I know (Chronicles of The Kings series), but this easy #ChriFic read was a pleasure. Librarian heroine, unpredictable plot twists, and a little romance made for an engaging story.

Notes From A Blue Bike by Tsh Oxenreider

Had a hard time getting into this one in ebook form. Better when I switched to hardback. I thought it either wasn’t enough memoir or wasn’t enough practical tips. If you had to read one, I would suggest Tsh’s first book. #theartofsimple

Worth The Fight

Worth The Fight by Kayse Pratt

A short ebook about maintaining your high maintenance marriage. Kayse covers topics like communication, service, and sex with truth and humor. A nice naptime read with good reminders.

Dear Mr. Knightley by Katherine Reay

Dear Mr. Knightley is a rich and readable story with subtle spiritual themes. It is sure to get you busting out your college English syllabus and dropping your favorite Austen quips in everyday conversation. Read the full review for more of why I LOVED this book. #2014fave

 Mommy Time: 90 Devotionals for the New Mom by Sarah Arthur

A devotional memoir that all new moms should read. Don’t be dissuaded by the title. I find myself on every page. Sarah articulates the joys, anxieties, and struggles of motherhood with humor and honesty. The devotional aspect isn’t cheesy. I find myself reading multiple devotions per day.

Cookbooks

Moosewood Restaurant Low-Fat Favorites: Flavorful Recipes for Healthful Meals

A thrift store find that turned out to be a major gem. Lower fat (without seeming diety) versions of all manner of foods. No photos, but once you make the Banana Bundt Cake or Black Bean Chilaquiles you won’t need the visual proof that these recipes are delicious!

The Naptime Chef: Fitting Great Food into Family Life by Kelsey Banfield 

Recipes that are easy to prep during naptime and quick to finish so you can eat well with small children at home. Crispy Bacon Mac and Cheese is like crispy cheese crack. Her Cranberry Granola has apple cider and maple syrup (on my 2nd batch) and I’ve had the Baked Cheese Dip at the restaurant where she got the recipe. #winner

Board Books

Hush Little Polar Bear by Jeff Mack

Follow a sweet polar bear on his night time adventures. The beautiful illustrations and lyrical text has made it an instant favorite on my end. James seemed captivated, too.

Country Babies Wear Plaid by Michelle Sinclair Colman

More pictures than story, this simple book is just super cute. Not only do country babies wear plaid, but they wake at dawn and tend their animals. Each thing that a country baby does is illustrated with a baby in plaid, of course. #charmer

Good Night Lake by Adam Gamble

Though this book celebrates the Finger Lakes region in New York, it’s a must for anyone who lives or vacations by a lake. There’s morning and evening greetings for things, people, and activities around the lake. James particularly liked the deer…

I received a free copy of Notes From A Blue Bike and Worth The Fight in exchange for my honest review. All opinions my own. 

 

Dear Mr. Knightley {a review}

~ Emily ~ 11 Comments

Dear Mr. Knightley

 

This post contains affiliate links. Read full disclosure here.

Dear English Majors, Literature Lovers, and Janeites,

It’s time to embrace your inner book nerd, to get down with your classics quoting bad self. You need to stop reading whatever you’re reading and pick up Katherine Reay‘s debut novel, Dear Mr. Knightley. I conveniently started this book a couple days before my husband got food poisoning. The story was so good, my 8 hour vigil seemed like an afternoon by the pool. (Actually, the all-nighter was rough, but I was so glad to have a page-turner to keep me company while Tim was endlessly vomiting…)

Now, I know the title alone would convince most of you that this book was worth reading – because who among us can pass up a nod to Austen? – but, Dear Mr. Knightley goes beyond your average, albeit enjoyable, Austen sequel. Mrs. Reay cleverly integrates classic literature into a nuanced plot that is both charming and poignant. Plus, she gives a nod to the likes of Lady Susan, Clarissa, and Pamela by writing the story in epistolary form.

The story centers around Sam, a twenty-three year old orphan who is back at Grace House after getting fired from her desk job. When an anonymous benefactor offers to fund her continued education, Sam reluctantly applies to Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism. There’s a catch: on top of her doubts about the program, she must write regular letters to the mysterious donor who chooses to be addressed as Mr. Knightley. A unique relationship develops as Sam begins to sort through her painful past in the one-sided letters.

If Sam’s habit of quoting Dumas, Austen, and the Brontë sisters doesn’t engross you, the cast of supporting characters will keep you turning pages. The enigmatic writer, the sweet professor and his wife, and the brooding youth bring engaging complexity to Sam’s journey.

Veins of social justice, faith, and romance add to the literature steeped narrative. I learned more about the foster system, the importance of genuine relationships, and the process of forgiveness. I also appreciated the unexpected plot resolution and can’t wait for Mrs. Reay’s next book.

Dear Mr. Knightley is a rich and readable story with subtle spiritual themes. It is sure to get you busting out your college English syllabus and dropping your favorite Austen quips in everyday conversation. Even if you don’t catch all the literature references, you will thoroughly enjoy this novel.

Sincerely,

Emily

(a fellow English major, literature lover, and Janeite)

P.S. Don’t miss the questions at the back to discuss with your bookish friends.

P.P.S. Any book that mentions both Jane Austen and Fletch is a winner.

)

Embracing The New Normal

~ Emily ~ 8 Comments

Just over five weeks ago, a miracle happened. A new life entered the world with gusty cries and flailing arms. I gave birth to a pint-sized person who forever changed my life on that day. Our family is now one person bigger. Our room sleeps three instead of two. Our bodies produced another body who is now flesh and blood among us. And like with any other extraordinary occurrence, the wake of this miracle has changed more than just the physical. I have a new role, new responsibilities, and a new routine.

I have a new normal.

embracing the new normal

My house is in constant need of picking up. I’m still wearing my maternity jeans. My mom makes most every meal. I have to be careful about bouncing too much during Zumba or I just may wet my pants a little. My hair sees more spit-up than shampoo. I cry for joy at the thought of 3 hours straight of sleep. My thoughts are barely coherent and they most certainly don’t get written down in my journal.

But, ever since that miracle happened, the one so full of hope and joy, I’ve been striving to get back to the old normal. I strive like there’s some magical moment when life will return to its usual stride. I strive like after a certain amount of weeks James will just be an add on to the old normal. In the old normal, I could keep my house clean and have dinner on the table when Tim got home from work. I fit into skinny jeans that didn’t have an elastic waist band. In the old normal, I could jog a 5K without feeling like I got run over by a semi truck the next day. I had time to process, journal, and share regularly in this space. While I’m sure some of those old normal habits will return in time, I’m not sure making that my goal is wise.

Specific goals get in the way of healthy adjustment. They can take the focus away from progress and place it on results. Adjusting to motherhood isn’t some black and white event with a definite beginning and end. It’s all a messy, grey process. I can’t just arrive at adjustment like my little one arrived in the world – hard and fast with a wail and one final push. I need to define my new normal by how I engage the process instead of the outcome.

So, I walked a 5K at the gym. I napped instead of vacuuming because I’m a better mom and wife when I get enough sleep. I read a board book instead of a novel. I haven’t started a strict diet so my body makes enough milk.

I’m participating in the process of my new normal. I don’t want to miss out on the nuances of this season because I was consumed with the past. I don’t want to fight the changes involved with motherhood, this miracle.

What I’m Into – February 2014

~ Emily ~ 16 Comments

What I'm Into

Parts of this post have been sitting in drafts since January. I didn’t link up last month because I had a baby Which brings me to the most important thing I’ve been into this month – my son, James!

James Gardner

My brother-in-law’s sister designed this cute announcement for us. Now I’m just waiting on my self-inking address stamp I had made via Vista Print (so I don’t have to write our return address on every. single. envelope) to send them out. The $15 dollars was a good investment, I think.

James at one month

James turned one month old yesterday. Just wow. He smiles and grunts (A LOT) and always has his hands by his face. Yes, his middle name comes from To Kill A Mockingbird. I can’t get enough of his fuzzy head, thunder thighs, and yawn face.

{This post contains affiliate links. Read my full disclosure here.}

Good Reads

My current nursing activity is keeping up with my Feedly. I may not have read many books the past month, but I’ve read a whole ton of blog posts. These are winners:

  • 5 Reasons Mamas Don’t Take of Themselves via Naptime Diaries – I’m in the midst of creating new, healthy self-care habits as a mom.
  • Back to Writing and The Art of Unblogging via Trina Holden – Must reads if you are a writer/blogger. Trina’s advice is encouraging in my changing season of life.
  • Bursting via Little Did She Know – My new friend, Cara, considers the questions: How do you go about encouraging someone fainting in heart? What does it look like to come and console?

Next up on my book reading list is Dear Mr. Knightley, the debut novel by Katherine Reay, and I am beyond excited to start it today.

Good Listens

  • Oceans by Hillsong United – A gorgeous, moving song. I love the folky, lyrical style. Similar to Psalm 23, one of my favorites by Reality SF.
  • Hold You Up by Shane Harper
  • I’m digging Jake Bugg after seeing him perform on American Idol last night.
  • Ask It: Edged Out by Andy Stanley – Simple and straightforward. One of the best sermons I’ve heard on boundaries/purity.

Good Eats

  • Magnum Minis – Small versions of the decadent Magnum ice cream bars.
  • Fig-Prosciutto Pizza with Arugula via Pioneer Woman – A toothsome combo. We’ve made these modifications: whole wheat Boboli crust because whole wheat is delicious and quicker than making your own, regular mozzarella because fresh made our first round soupy, spring mix because our pack of arugula had gone bad, and crisping the prosciutto before putting on pizza because crispy prosciutto is good prosciutto.
  • Man Pleasing Chicken via Witty in The CIty –  Some of the best chicken I’ve eaten. How could you go wrong with mustard, maple syrup, and rosemary?
  • Raspberry Lemon Pie via Thimbleanna – Summer in my mouth.

Linking up with Leigh!