Category: Books & Reading

Surprised by Motherhood: my story

~ Emily ~ Leave a comment

For me, motherhood was quite literally a surprise. Tim and I had been trying – trying not to have a baby, yet. I was thinking three years into our marriage would be nice. Maybe then I would have done all the things I thought I should do before having a baby.

So, when I woke up that morning feeling pretty nauseous, I took a pregnancy test not because I really thought I was pregnant, but because the idea of being pregnant would niggle at me until I ruled it out completely.

I left the test on the bathroom floor to percolate and promptly got distracted by dirty dishes and unpacking the house we had just moved into the week prior. It wasn’t until I almost stepped on the white stick on my way to the toilet that I remembered I was waiting on some important news.

I bent down. Paused. Blinked. Bent down further. Two blue lines were staring back at me from the bathroom floor.

This wasn’t a hubby’s home early, it’s a brand new car, I aced my test kind of surprise. There was no confetti, no candles, no cake. I even took four more tests in the next 36 hours to confirm it actually was the surprise we thought it was.

From the very start, motherhood was a surprise. And if the last 15 months is any indicator, I will continue to be surprised by motherhood.Surprised by Motherhood

I was surprised by the anxiety and fear that gripped my heart at every doctors appointment.

I was surprised by the grief I felt as my season of life changed.

I was surprised by the struggles I had with my growing body. (Well, knowing my history, that wasn’t a big surprise.)

I was (pleasantly) surprised by the way the development our little one was knitting Tim and I closer together.

I was surprised at how much love a heart can hold for such a small person.

I am surprised by how something could be so hard and so wonderful all at the same time.

I am surprised by the grace and joy so intricately woven into everyday with our son.

I am continually surprised by God’s faithfulness to meet me right where I am.

~~~

 

It’s hard to see the significance when you’re so weighed down by the mundane. And it can feel like everyone else around you is busy doing big, important things while you have worn the same spit-up-stained sweatpants three days in a row.

Lisa-Jo Baker in Surprised by Motherhood

The journey to, from, and around motherhood is a sprawling story with often complicated plot lines. Lisa-Jo Baker shares her journey in Surprised by Motherhood. Her story is beautifully written and engaging, grace-filled and encouraging. I cried, I laughed, and I amen’d my way through her tale of loss and redemption. It’s a must read for any mom!

But, I believe God loves us too much to leave us flailing in our self-centered universes, so He delivers these tiny reflections of ourselves into our homes with earthquake effectiveness.

Lisa-Jo Baker in Surprised by Motherhood

Sam

~ Emily ~ 2 Comments

For reasons other than patriotism, July has truly been a month of freedom.

What often entraps us are our repeated offenses and that has definitely been the case for me. But, God has been faithful to soften my heart and bring me to a place of surrender with body image issues and contentment struggles that have previously stuck closer than a shadow.

Healing is a process, but the lightness of being I’ve experienced from accepting the freedom that God and His word offers is a gift.

A certain Samaritan woman is no stranger to both the sins that can shackle a soul and the freedom found in taking God’s hand. Her story is more relevant that I ever imagined. Read more about her story of shame, redemption, and hope on Kindred Grace {HERE} today! (You’ll also get to see a photo of my Elizabeth Bennet moment in Scotland…)

~~~

If the Samaritan woman’s story intrigues you, I recommend grabbing a copy of Paperdoll: What Happens When an Ordinary Girl Meets an Extraordinary God. Natalie Lloyd (who you may recognize as a columnist from Brio Magazine, my first magazine addiction) follows “Sam’s” journey to the well and her encounter with Living Water. She dissects the story in a way that makes it relevant and relatable to our society and culture. Natalie writes honestly and is a wonderful storyteller. The book includes great study questions, too.

Our worth isn’t wrapped up in what other people say about us, either. Our worth is woven into the fabric of God’s Word, into the ultimate truth that sets us free to be the unique, beautiful, godly women we were created to be.

Natalie Lloyd inPaperdoll

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On vulnerability, battle cries, and Glennon Melton

~ Emily ~ Leave a comment

When writers commit to vulnerability in their work, they are inviting readers into the most sensitive areas of their lives. Layer upon layer of garments, grit, and grime are shed with every word until nothing is left but the bare essentials. Authenticity and truth-telling leave a person naked and unarmed. It’s both a scary and freeing place to be.

Too often, we view vulnerability like a super power, treating those who possess the uncanny ability to be completely honest like they are made of cold, hard steel, brandishing their mistakes and faults like a sword. What we view as a weapon is hardly even a shield. Instead of deflecting or conquering pain and trials, authenticity leaves people bare and unprotected.

It’s easy to respond with judgement even though the battle cry of vulnerability is, “I’m human. I’m just like you!”

We heap on expectations and assumptions like transparency equals perfection. The fact is, authenticity and vulnerability don’t exempt one from mistakes. Truth-tellers are brave, but they are not invincible.

Carry On, Warrior

Glennon Melton, of Momastery.com, is well-known for being one of those brave truth-tellers. She has made a name for herself writing about faith, marriage, and motherhood with an honesty that can be shocking, humorous, and heart wrenching all at the same time.

The blogosphere has come to honor and glorify this type of all-or-nothing honesty and, in turn, readers have come to demand it.  But, we don’t always remember that life is a process. What is true and real right now may not be true and real a week, a month, a year from now. It is unreasonable to apply static standards to the ever shifting seasons of life.

Most of my readers have agreed to an unwritten rule that we don’t use the truth’s I tell against me… I walk onto this field every day without armor or weapons, by choice, and so the risk is that every once in a while, someone will shoot. It happens, it hurts, and it always makes me want to quit writing.

Glennon in Carry On, Warrior

I have been guilty of being a sniper, standing on the sidelines applying static standards to the conclusions someone has made about the ever shifting seasons of in their life. As a consumer and producer of this type of honesty, I want grace and tenderness to infuse my response to vulnerability. I want to see past the point where my views intersect with theirs and appreciate where our thoughts may diverge.

It is with this in mind that I read Carry On, Warrior: The Power of Embracing Your Messy, Beautiful Life, Glennon’s collection of new essays and best-loved material from her blog.

Glennon is unflinchingly honest about her “brutiful” life, sharing the ins and outs of addiction, a shotgun marriage, motherhood, and friendship. Her perspective on life and faith will appeal to Millennial Christians who are frustrated by the anti-this, anti-that sentiments prevalent in religion today.

I didn’t always resonate with her sense of humor (though I won’t go to the dentist without thinking of her) and her challenges with motherhood/marriage aren’t quite the same as mine, but I found her honesty disarming in the best of ways.

There were gems like this:

But when your miracle doesn’t happen the way you planned, it becomes important to look for peripheral miracles. Peripheral miracles are those that aren’t directly in front of you. They’re not the ones on which you’ve been too damned focused. You have to turn your head to see peripheral miracles.

Carry On, Warrior (261)

And, since the book contained selections from her blog, I will be able to refer back to some of my favorite pieces.

And then, there were the pieces that reminded me of other writers I love and admire and their unique battle cry.

Overall, I enjoyed reading Carry On, Warrior – in part for the reason I think everyone should read Can I Ask That and also for those little gems that challenge and bloom into truth for the giver and receiver.

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What I’m Reading

~ Emily ~ 6 Comments

I’m doing something a little different today to share what I’ve been reading. I hope you enjoy this (my first) video. I will work on my “um” usage in the next one :)

I resisted the urge to write a script for this little book chat, so, naturally, I forgot a few things I wanted to say about the books. If you have questions about any of the books, leave a comment or email me – I’d be happy to elaborate.

Here’s more info on the books I mentioned:

Insurgent by Veronica Roth

Pulling Back The Shades: Erotica, Intimacy, and the Longings of A Woman’s Heart by Dannah Gresh and Juli Slattery

Mommy Time: 90 Devotions for New Moms by Sarah Arthur

Can I Ask That? 8 Hard Questions About God and Faith by Jim Candy, Kara Powell, and Brad Griffin

Rhinestone Jesus by Kristen Welch

Too Many Hopkins by Tomie dePaola (apparently not in print anymore, but worth tracking down)

Llama Llama Nighty-Night by Anna Dewdney

I mentioned Twitterature in this video – check out my Twitterature posts for short, casual book reviews.

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Can I Ask That?

~ Emily ~ 4 Comments

It all started with the apocrypha. My Intro to the Bible course required a Bible with the apocrypha. I hadn’t ever heard of the apocrypha, but since it wasn’t in the NIV Bible I had been using most of my life, I was instantly wary. My expectations were high going in to my first year at a small, Christian college and this wasn’t the start I was picturing.

While my classmates and professor discussed different theories behind the canonical order of the gospels, I sat cringing in my seat. By the time we started reading from the Gospel of Thomas, I had mentally, emotionally, and spiritually checked out. Biblical criticism was a new concept for me and I wasn’t prepared for the inner conflict welling up as we studied various viewpoints on Scripture. I was confident, maybe a little cocky, in what I believed, but I found myself unable to explain many of my convictions in the face of these new concepts.

I hadn’t expected my beliefs to be academically challenged. That’s certainly not what I had been looking for in a “Bible class.” Since I purposefully didn’t take another religion course in college after that, God found other ways to break through my spiritual comfort zone, which, in retrospect, was one of the best things about my college experience. Those four years became a turning point in my spiritual journey. I began to wrestle with my beliefs and make faith decisions for myself. There was less spiritual assumption and more circumstances that required me to articulate my beliefs.

As I continue to follow Christ, I’ve realized that questioning your faith and having your faith questioned is an essential part of spiritual formation. Unfortunately we live in a Christian culture that doesn’t always encourage questions. Especially if you’ve grown up in the church, questions are associated with doubting and woe be unto thee who doubts…

As someone who comes in contact with youth on a regular basis (my husband, Tim, is a youth pastor and I’ve volunteered in middle and high school ministries for the past four years), I want to be someone who embraces and encourages questions.

Tim models this very well in his own life and in ministry. He’s chosen a book for the high school group to walk through on Sunday mornings together that encourages students to explore their faith and ask tough questions. I was challenged to grapple with my convictions about the character of God, women in ministry, and the validity of Scripture while reading through this book.

Can I Ask That?Despite being geared towards students, I couldn’t help but wish everyone would read Can I Ask That? 8 Hard Questions About God & Faith. Even though it was written as a curriculum for students, the content promotes conversation and critical thinking about common questions asked by believers and non-believers alike.

The authors of Can I Ask That? don’t give answers to the 8 difficult topics covered. They guide readers in discovering their own convictions and help them to articulate the why.

Beyond the important themes and values supporting the content, here are some other reasons I love Can I Ask That?:

  1. Design: The graphics, layout, and illustrations are just plain cool.
  2. Format: Each question is approached from five different angles – story, questions, notes, scripture, and dialogue. The stories and dialogue are fictional but so relevant and relatable. I’m not too old to know the authors have taken an accurate pulse on the current generation.
  3. Conversation: You can just tell Can I Ask That? was created and crafted to promote conversation. The authors provide tips for promoting healthy dialogue (in the leader guide) and the question sections are designed like conversation bubbles. Readers may not recognize the hints, but this book is filled with the subtle message to get talking!

Can I Ask That? would be an awesome book to go through as a family, too. I’m excited to be part of the conversations we will have on Sunday mornings with our high school group this Summer and I’m even more excited (and somewhat terrified) about having these conversations with James as he grows.

I never want to be too old or too comfortable in my faith to ask questions. Can I Ask That? is a great place to start.

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