Dear Ash {31 Days of Letters}

October 18, 2012 ~ Emily ~ 5 Comments

Dear Ash,

I think we could be poster children for the old adage, “opposites attract.” If our physical appearances weren’t enough – my six feet with blonde hair and blue eyes verses your five-ish feet with green/brown/hazel eyes and curly, brown hair – our personality types are pretty drastically different. My reserved self has always been in awe of your ability to engage a crowd. You could make a tree laugh with one of your stories and I’m better off writing about my escapades.

In defiance of these differences, our friendship works. Our history spans a quarter-century and we have the pictures, crushes, letters, embarrassing moments (some on tape… eg: falling off swing in southern belle costume), laughter and tears to prove it. Like many friendships, ours was not devoid of bad boundaries, hurt feelings, and lulls in communication.

I am ever so glad that God redeemed the locust years, per se, and renewed our friendship. With God as the center, our relationship has a whole new dimension that not only pushes me closer to our Abba, but also gives me a deep appreciation for having a friend who is so different than me.

Though I could make a lengthy list of all the things I love about you and what our friendship means to me, I wanted to point out two differences between us that have taught me so much about being a Godly woman: 1. your fearless vulnerability and 2. your intimacy with God.

As Anne Jackson would say, you have the “gift of seconds.” Your honesty and openness is refreshing and challenging. God gives you the boldness to share first so those of us who are silenced by shame, fear, or pride have an easier time going second. I have mentally and verbally fessed up to struggles and sins that I would not have normally had the courage to think or speak. But, because you were willing to be transparent, I was able to follow suit.

I’ve always been a bit envious of the way you talk about God. You hear His voice in the inner most parts of your being and are able to articulate what He is revealing. You see Him as the lover that He is. Your intimacy with God has pushed me to reevaluate how I approach my own relationship with Him. I have to remind myself that God woes and pursues me, but that idea seems to come naturally to you. You’ve prompted me to open my heart to God as the Lover of My Soul.

So, I thank you for your vulnerability with me and your intimacy with Christ. They have thrust me deeper into God’s arms.

This was in a post that you must read.

…she told me why it was beautiful to HER and in that way, SHE became more beautiful to me. Because she let me see her and hear her story with all its unique markings and pain and hope and love.

It made me think of you and how you reveal beauty and how much I love seeing your beauty being revealed. Being involved in your story, hearing about its unique markings, pain, hope, and love has made you even more important to me.

I love you!

Em

You can find all my letters here.

For more information about the 31 Day Challenge, visit The Nester.

Dear Wedding Well-wishers {31 Days of Letters}

October 17, 2012 ~ Emily ~ 3 Comments

Dear Wedding Well-wishers,

I would like to propose that we think of a better way to inquire after a newly-married person’s life. I include myself in this think-tank because I am just as guilty as anyone in this regard. We mean well – we want to extend congratulations and see how the new man and wife are getting along – but asking, “How’s married life?” puts a new bride or groom in a tough spot.

Let me rephrase that. It puts an honest person in a tough spot. When most of us are just wanting to be nice and acknowledge the person’s new status, why ask a question that promotes the idea that marriage is a bed of roses? The truth is, marriage takes work. Acclimating to marriage, especially in the first few months, can be challenging. Married life is full of adjustment, compromise, and self-sacrifice – all of which can be rather hard at times.

The difficult aspects of marriage do not diminish the joys and pleasures of married life (and aren’t those what we’re actually asking about when we inquire after a newlywed’s well-being anyway…). For myself, I love being married to my best friend, living in the same house, sharing the same bed. Those benefits of marriage can coexist quite happily with the tough parts. However, I think most people don’t vocalize both sides to the married life coin as often as they are asked about it after the wedding.

When well-wishers like yourself asked me how married life is, I may have shocked them with my answer: “Being married to Tim is wonderful, but married life is challenging right now.” Tim and I, especially, faced a lot of transition and unknowns within the first few months of our marriage, which probably contributed to my transparent answer.

I realize not every couple has this type of start to their married life. We didn’t have a home to call our own, and neither of us had permanent jobs. Two months after we got married, we still had no idea where we would be moving.

I also realize that you well-wishers are well meaning. But, if you’re looking for a one-word answer or small talk, you may want to rephrase how you ask about married life. When you run across an open person, their answer may take you by surprise.

Sincerely,

Emily

You can find all my letters here.

For more information about the 31 Day Challenge, visit The Nester.

Dear Brother {31 Days of Letters}

October 16, 2012 ~ Emily ~ 1 Comment

Dear Tim,

Last time I checked, we were driving around the front yard in trash can cars and making capes out of towels. Wasn’t it yesterday that there were cardboard forts on the patio and a very exuberant Golden Retriever waiting for us by the trampoline?

Since when did we grow up? You’re living on the opposite side of the country and in grad school. I’m married. It couldn’t possibly be two years since we were making a game out of killing the copious amounts of crickets in our apartment (I won!).

newborn — It doesn’t seem possible that this was 25 1/2 years ago.

The swiftness with which time moves forward frightens me sometimes. If the past twenty-five years of our lives together could skip by as quickly as they did, I can’t imagine how the next twenty-five will progress. Honestly, I’m a bit anxious about facing the changes those years are sure to hold.

Over the years, we went from small rivals to partners in crime to friends, and I am thankful everyday that we are more than just siblings. Over the years, we lived with parents, went to college, shared an apartment, and moved to two new states. I am grateful for all the time we got to spend in close proximity to one another.

The reality of the new seasons in both our lives knocked the wind out of me a little this weekend. Mom and I were trying to figure out options for celebrating Christmas together and I realized just how different everything is. We have progressed from sharing a bathroom to seeing each other a few times a year with calls in between. It seems like the transition happened overnight.

If mom and Uncle Jim are any indication, I know we will still maintain a close, special relationship. I am grateful for the example of what joy can come from this new sibling season. I think I’m just stunned at how quickly a new season can show up.

I’m looking forward to the years to come, with fun-filled and laughter infused reunions. Maybe introducing our kids to Hiss and the gang together…

I love you so much, my brother! I pray that God continues to grow us closer together and closer to Him in the next twenty-five years.

Love,

Dewy

You can find all my letters here.

For more information about the 31 Day Challenge, visit The Nester.

Dear Weekend {31 Days of Letters}

October 15, 2012 ~ Emily ~ 2 Comments

Dear Weekend,

Parting with you is so very bittersweet. I usually don’t acknowledge the imminence of your departure because it’s too painful. My weeks are nothing to dread – no laborious job, no duties I despise – but there’s an element of freedom that begins to build come Friday which rarely makes an appearance during the work week.

You offer unconstrained time. Hours are strung together with nothing to hold them hostage. You are like a blank canvas waiting to be splashed with colors and textures of the artist’s own choosing. Spontaneity is your medium, and there are no rules.

As a planner, I find your unscheduled-self refreshing. I can be the author of chaos or calm. Whatever I choose you will most certainly oblige. With such manners, it’s no wonder why people, like myself, love you.

I love how I can sleep in, read a book for hours, and watch too much Downton Abbey all on your time without feeling guilty. I love how you have a time for worship, community, service, and fellowship. I love that there is time to be still and time for adventure.

All this to say, I can’t bear to bid farewell. Even knowing that ours is only a temporary parting does not ease the sense of loss that Monday brings. Please slip away quietly and be swift in your return.

Sincerely,

Emily

You can find all my letters here.

For more information about the 31 Day Challenge, visit The Nester.

Dear Kenya {31 Days of Letters}

October 14, 2012 ~ Emily ~ 4 Comments

Dear Kenya,

Yours is a beautiful and brutal land. It is wild and lush, exotic yet harsh. Your people are strong and stubborn. I am captivated by your traditions, your children, your history and future. I could write a million words to describe what two weeks with you did to my heart. Instead, I will let images speak in my stead.